Sunday, February 12, 2012

Perspective

I could write about perspective as it pertains to photography but that would be too predictable!
I have been feeling conflicted lately, with being a mom. Sometimes I wonder if I made the right choice, to have a baby. I know that sounds so horrible. I feel like I had no concept how hard being a mom would be. Everyone can tell you how it's the "most challenging" job you will ever do, but there is no way you can know what it really means, until you are there, in that role as a mom. Some of my difficulties were in the physical demands of chasing him around, trying to clean up after him, trying to spend enough time with him, and of course the mental exhaustion of never being able to stop worrying if I'm doing the right things for him. If I am too cautious, will I raise a boy that is scared of everything? The list really could go on and on........
I was beginning to wonder if it's all really worth it.
I knew right then that the MPG needed a change of scenery!!!
I went to Chicago to visit one of my oldest friends. She's a mom of three and I figured I may be able to get a different perspective on my own mothering in visiting her.
Her youngest is only 3 weeks old! Her family is trying to adjust to its newest member. I thought for sure it would be stressful and chaotic with the 3 kids. I wasn't though. I came to see that it wasn't work for her. I was a labor of love. She didn't need to physically get "something"out of being a mom, it came from the intangibles.
The love, the smiles and the laughter.
I'd never left MPB before overnight before and he's almost 2! He did wonderfully without his momma. Honestly, he didn't really know I was gone until I came home and then he wouldn't let me out of his sight. LOL. I have to say I did ok when I left. I was ok for most of the day. Then there where a few times I'd just see my friend with her kids and it would make me miss the MPB so much my heart ached.
I truly understand the pay offs now. Leaving my boy for a little over
24 hours, it's so much more clear !
Motherhood, with all his difficulties, is made so simple,
so worth ALL of it, when you see this....
MPB, I love you more each day!

No comments:

Post a Comment